Monday, December 10, 2007

All is well! My depression has ended!

I was somewhat depressed for the greater part of a day due to a comment from the Peanut Gallery. Unfortunately, I care about what my grandfather Carl says.

However, I am over it, and as long as doesn't mention that horribly disgusting and sickening comment, or anything related to it, I'll be okay. I can forget, if not forgive.

I have attended two Christmas Parties, the first was apparently the excuse to utter the comment, and the second was much better dispite the fact that it was a company party, which by definition are usually very boring. That says a lot.

I didn't get to karioke like I was hoping to, but I don't know a lot of songs, anyway. I was thinking of doing the carol Silent Night accipello, but no-one was brave enough to sing the melody so that I could sing the Tenor part.

Bloody yellow-bellies!

Well, I've made some progress on the Python, and I'm already planning on how I'm going to arrainge the perfect carioke session next year, as they are probably going to do it next year, since they had such a good turnout of Half-Price employees.

You should have seen the gal singing an Irish drinking song as it should be sung. That was great. What made it even better was the fact that fellow employees were equipped with camcorders as to play it for her when she was sober. Unbounded joy for her! ;)

I will post again soon. Bye!

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Quick Update

Well, I just had my
Birthday, on November the 13th, and I got a cake, a Barnes and Noble
gift card with $30 on it. I also got a motherboard, though I hope to
get a matching processor for Christmas. That is the last time I let
anyone I know get a cake from that Kroger. Especially one with
strawberries. The day after we brought it home, it sprouted fine silky
fuzz with little black capsules. (Read: Mold)


Anyway, I have been
practicing my PHP coding skills a little, and I'm thinking about
starting on learning Python.

I recently (Saturday, December the 1st) presented my part in the Christmas
piano recital over there at Valley View Mall, outside Dillards, I think. My mom and I did
fairly well on "Up On the Housetop,"
but the page-turn messed up our coordination on "Greensleeves," (or "What Child is This,"
according to the Program Sheet) so we did well on the first half, but
were noticeably faltering on the second half of the first go through,
though I think we corrected ourselves sufficiently once we turned from
the first page to the second page the second time. (My mom doesn't agree.) I think we did well,
overall, though, and from the glowing appreciation everyone poured on
us after we were through, made me think that it wasn't bad, just
imperfect.

Later that day, I sang
at my Church's Nativity/Creche Presentation. I sang Tenor, and I sang
in quite a few Carols. Two of them were sung by the whole Congregation, and
four were sung specifically by the Choir, only, and we practiced heavily months in
advance, which appeared to pay off, not only to my own ears, as I think
we sounded gorgeous, but we were paid many compliments by all sorts of
people. I think I was given around two compliments, myself, and my
grandmother was given some as well.

I temporarily fixed the problems with my router, as it was acting up.
It can be such an attention-seeker sometimes. It must have felt
abandoned or lonely or something, but it picked a bad time to make a
scene, as I was filling out a form on line, and the connection quit as
I submitted it. It was a huge form, and of course it didn't save my
work, so about 15 minutes to half an hour went down the drain.
Thankfully, it wasn't of utmost importance, or I'd be pulling my hair
out in frustration.

I found my Izod jacket. I thought it had disappeared off the face of
the planet through the miniature black hole that took up residence in
our apartment. The drier isn't this malevolent, so I know it isn't that.

Richard, if he hasn't repeated a grade, will be coming out of school
this coming May. I can't wait to apologize to him, befriend him, and
tell him how sick I was to be mean to him, to use him in my
attention-seeking behaviors, etal. If he reads this blog, I want to
tell him I love him whether he forgives his big, bad big brother or
not. I'm really a big softy, and if he wants to, he can beat up on me
for a whole year.

I offer a year of retribution as penance.

I also offer this reassurance. All of that disturbing nonsense I was
coming out with at Buckner's and such, I said to get attention. I never
meant it, not one tiny bit. Not that you'd trust my word, though the
thought pains me, but I give you that to consider.

I loved you very
much, no matter what, I'll make it up to you. Both of us were being arses. For some reason, I
wanted to be the bigger arse, so I tried. Unfortunately, I think I succeeded.

I love you little brother, and I really hope you come to forgive me. I
have some plans as to what we could do as brothers, like go skating
with Mom, watch movies with Mom, and the like.

I know I have broken your trust, but when you need a place to stay,
email me at mailto:maurin.alex@gmail.com,
okay?

I'll be waiting for you.

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Turns Out I Was Wrong in My Calculations....

This is for the consumption of family, so don't think I'm broadcasting to the general public, here. I'm not.

News on Richard Arthur Maurin:

Richard is 17, and will be graduating this next year.

We are not really prepared at the moment.

We need to get a house or something, big enough to contain us all.



My current sizes are:

Shirt: L
Jacket: M-L (It depends)
Pants: 36W / 34L
Shoes: 11
Colors: Winter colors (blue, white, black, tan/khaki, gray, red)

Saturday, October 27, 2007

Google Acting Up, and the Interim

Well, I would have kept everybody on the upo and up, had several factors not played a trick on me.

First, Google was having some server trouble, then my computer was being slower than usual, so I backed up some stuff, and wiped the hard disk.

I had trouble getting it back to working condition, and then when we got ourselves a piano, we had to move some stuff out of the way.

That resulted in the DSL modem getting lost. It still is, and we are still looking for it.

Anyway, I thought I'd get that out there real quick while I'm sitting around doing nothing at a friend of mine's place.

Well, gotta go. I'll give you guys a more thourough sescription of the going-ons mlater. Bye!

Friday, September 28, 2007

Fall '07 Semester Starting Soon

I'm about to start my next semester at DeVry University - Irving.

According to my tentative schedule, I'll be taking MATHLAB (online math curriculum from Pearson Education <http://www.coursecompass.com> | <http://www.mathxl.com>), Advanced Composition, and Routing fundamentals.

Let's see, I'm going to be 20 years old on the 13th of November, so that'll be how many days?

I don't know off the top of my head, and I'm a little old to spend time calculating things like that, so I guess I won't start a count down.

I know what I want for my birthday, but it is quite unlikely that I will get any of the items on the list.


For example:

  1. A new Toshiba or HP Laptop, midrange+, fully Linux-compatible
  2. A midrange digital camera that is known for Linux compatibility
  3. An upper midrange (musical) keyboard to go with the laptop, with Rosegarden (A professional audio and MIDI sequencer, score editor, and general-purpose music composition and editing environment. Rosegarden is an easy-to-learn, attractive application that runs on Linux, ideal for composers, musicians, music students, and small studio or home recording environments.) in mind, and finally, but not least importantly,
  4. nice pants that fit

Well, so much for that.

I might be able to summon enough collective holiday credit to at least get some decent clothes, and I'd be happy with that.

[for those who know me:]
I wear:

Pants: 36W/34L
Shirt: L
Shoes: 11 (1/2)
Colors: blue, red, purple, jewel green, (I'd stick with blues. If you can get a brilliant blue-violet shirt, that would be great.

Anyway, gotta go. My access is going out the window.

Friday, September 21, 2007

Imperial March (Rage Mix), by Force Commander




This one is neat.

Metallica Imperial March




Imagine Bush Baby Playing This....

Nah, he wouldn't be that smart.

Friday, August 31, 2007

Richard Should be Graduating Soon

Richard Arthur Maurin, I think, should be graduating this year, unless he has been flunked a grade.

I wonder if he'll be able to find this Blog before he gets kicked out of Care, or gets sucked into an Adult Institution he may never get out of.

I hope he does find this, and know I care about his well-being.

I may not have shown it, but I do care.

...

I need to go!


Class is going to start soon!


Chao!

I Can't Believe Summer's Over, but I Should

I never really did get to enjoy the Summer fully, as I didn't participate in a big splashing swim party. I don't think I ever was aware one existed nearby that I could attend.

It may not help that I think Splash War is a fun game (I'm damnably good at it, you see,) and tend to aggravate those who want to touch as little water as possible while still qualifying as "in the pool."

[mock whiny voice]

No-one wants to play with me!

[return to semi-normal]

But I did get to work my butt off doing schoolwork, while making time to familiarize myself with the joys of Anne McKaffrey's Dragonriders of Pern series, which lives up to it's reputation.

I've read "Dragonflight," "Dragonquest," "The White Dragon," and have just started on "Moreta: Dragonlady of Pern." All previous three were excellent, and surprisingly, Jaxom was quite plausible as a young male character, even though written by a mature woman. If she didn't emply ghostwriters, that is an achievment all by itself in my book.

I recently reviewed my grades and was reassured by the A/B grades.

I want a good cumulative GPA as much as the next college student, and I like that my GPA is now getting up there to the 3.x range. Last semester it was 3-dot-something, and hopefully it'll stay that way.

I'm semi-secretly planning to buy, or at least have bought a nice set of Expo Dry Erase markers for all of my favorite professors, Including Prof. Gabriel Bonner, Prof. Rusty Meadows, and Prof. Rajim Koonjbeary. I'm going to do this close to Chistmas, so that I can claim I gave them all gifts for Christmas. My memory may be pretty faulty, but I usually remember those people that actually went out of their way to make things doable for me, that didn't try to hinder me, or watched passively as I failed at something or things.

Anyway, things are going great at my end so far, and hopefully will continue doing so.

Chao!

Sunday, August 19, 2007

Time Sure Went By, Didn't It?

I'm now taking NETW202 "Intro to Networking," BUSN115 "Intro to Business," and MATHLAB.

I am planning on taking on Mandarin Chinese, that should be interesting.

I've gotten a 107% (Curved) on one of my more major Networking exams, not Cisco Netacad, but a written exam for an associated class.

Gotta go, classwork to be done.

Chao!

Sunday, July 1, 2007

Summer Semester #2

I have been spending a significant amount of time playing "Warcraft III: Reign of Chaos" on my Laptop against my Mom, who has lately been kicking my hiney, and our mutual friend, Dickey (who is an actual person). He doesn't have the time to really practice, but since we have invested so much time and money into it, I supposed he ahs decided to attept to leatl how to play.

I have played some on battle.net, but I'm still in noob territory, and I haven't completed the Campaign, yet. (That would be the single player storyline mode.)

I have developed some interesting maps via the included World Editor.

I'll include one, for those of you who happen to have a copy.

Chat Module follows:
There's no password, enter your first name as nick, and accept the room ID.

That's it!
(from freeJavaChat.com)


This application requires Java suport.
This server also available via IRC at:
irc://irc.ircstorm.net:6667/


Update for Summer Semester #1

I know I haven't posted in a while, so I thought I'd make it up to you guys by posting a really long one.

I have thought up some really neat ideas, ones I wished stuck with me, but I can say it would have made any book I wrote including those ideas quite deep.

I have pondered many things, some of which I will share with you.

I have thought about death, and how it affects people.

One of the ironies of life, said a friend at church, was that without death, there would be no time for "repentance."

I'm a Mormon, to some extent, or at least I'm born into a Mormon family, so I am familiar with a lot of Mormon ideology.

I have a brought-up-Neopegan bookworm (whom I wouldn't trade for the world) for a mom, and a sociopathic idiot who absurdly calls himself a Mormon for a would-be dad.

I love my mother, could care less about the other freak.

I have, as you guys probably figured out, been from public institution to public institution. Most of those were "residential treatment facilities," meaning I stayed there long-term, and got lots of head doctor attention. Mostly, I just had a bunch of orderlies look out for me, but there were a few guys and gals that were more than faceless "direct care personnel," or however they put the title. Some were true (or as close to true as you can get in a place like that) friends.

I especially honor Mrs. Williams-Coleman, in that she went (as far as I knew) beyond her duties, and actually took us under her wing as would a mother hen.

I really appreciate that.

Dr. Jack Charles Hinds is a great guy. He may have not been there every day, but over time, what I got to know of him showed that he was (and is) a quality guy.

There are others in similar facilities that I knew, Mr. Aaron from Meadow Pines RTC, as well as "Sphincter Woman," I called her that because I was "Sphincter Man" to her. It was an inside joke, obviously.

Also obvious, was that I couldn't come up with a better comeback quickly enough. I can do so now.

I went to the Angelika Film Center in Dallas for the first time. I watched "Paprika (2006)," a Japanese anime, which I enjoyed.


I will keep you posted!

-- Alex Maurin

Sunday, May 13, 2007

Mother's Day Poem

I wrote a poem for my mom and her mom. They both were pleased, though Mimi (Grandmother Penny) had issue with two lines. See if you can guess which ones:

Letter to an Unsuspecting Mother

(And Her Mother)



You ask why it is that I'd rather you didn't die,

Well I thought it rather obvious that I didn't lie

When I said I really do love you.

That is something I cannot deny: I really do.



Whenever you said I was facetious or rude

I never did say I was your clone, dude,

but I'm always your child, however crude.

I love you, and have always loved you, both.



I may choose a different path than you,

But that's not 'cause o' anything you did or did not do.

You are Mama and Mimi, and that settles the matter,

I'd trust you however the mercury, mad hatter!



As simple the words, however clichéd,

I cannot deny the truth.



Forever and always, and evermore,

I love you exponentially, more and more.



Can you see them? Anyway, see you guys later! Happy Mother's Day!

Monday, April 30, 2007

New Club - PC Gamers Club

PC Gamers Club
I am now looking to see how much interest there is for activity in a PC Gamers Club for DeVry at Irving ( www.dal.devry.edu ).
This club is still forming, and anyone enrolled in DeVry interested in joining please don't be afraid to claim positions.
I'm still figuring everything out, and kinda feeling my way through it, and I don't have anything concrete in mind,
but I was thinking that the club would consist of people who enjoy playing older multiplayer games, and not-so-old multiplayer games over an Ethernet LAN. Everything else would revolve around that singular purpose, to have fun slaying each other. My favorites that I have in mind are Warcraft III, Command and Conquer II: Red Alert, and similar games, but this club is DEFINATELY NOT restricted to that. Doom, Quake, Halo: Combat Evolved, and other games are definately in mind, and any member can suggest other multiplayer LAN games.
I can't wait to play Halo: Combat Evolved, and if I could just get comfotable with the controls, I might be interested in BattleMech 4: Mecenaries. The controls are goofy, so it'll take quite a bit of practice just to get comfortable with controlling the mech.
Anyway, happy fragging!

I Love My Brother

I Really Do Love My Brother


I know I do, because even though I mistreated him, I missed him when he was gone. I'm glad he got the chance to go to a family-setting foster home. I was never good enough for that. I was shipped from RTC to RTC (Residential Treatment Center), and they tossed me about like a hot potato.

I hope he comes home to:

6001A Orinda Drive
Dallas, TX 75248

If you find this page, Richie, click this link:

http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&hl=en&q=6001A+Orinda+Drive,+Dallas,+TX+75248&sll=37.0625,-95.677068&sspn=35.136115,59.238281&layer=&amp;ie=UTF8&om=1&z=16&ll=32.956753,-96.806846&spn=0.009092,0.014462

That opens to Google Maps with a map of our home selected.

Hope that helps.

See ya later.

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

I'll Be Waiting for my Classmates.

 I want to provide some way to keep connected with my classmates without peeing them off, so I guess I'll be playing a juggling act between this http://crazy-alex.blogspot.com, http://groups.google.com/group/devryu-class/

I love this song I downloaded and modified: http://groups.google.com/group/devryu-class/web/Mom-Torture-Song.mid.

That's the current version of it. Be warned, it's a bit repetitive, but it calms my nerves. Grandpa thinks of it as a war chant. I'd have to disagree.

I will keep you guys posted,

Alex

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Starting a New Term - Adds Spring to my Step

I'm feeling good today, having had a small respite from griping elderly family members, and having nothing important on the agenda (that I can think of, at least). I'm really hoping I can find a way to connect to my new classmates, but this is always a tricky business, because I'm dreadful at using a phone, and no one uses email, chat (either IRC, Jabber, or the new one, PSYC - see http://www.psyc.eu/psyc.html or even any proprietary one either) as I more primary means of coordinating things. mailing-lists are fairly good, but chat is definitely my preferred mode of communication over long distances in a synchronous fashion. The eCollege version of web forum, called Threaded Discussion, does the job, but underlying that is the assumption that everyone will be unable to communicate effectively at around the same time. I do prefer to type than speak (when attempting formality, anyway, as I love eye-to-eye chatting when you're not being recorded with a microphone, the records of which are to be scrutinized by a bunch of white-coats). I also like testing and trying new technologies, and I have some hope for that new PSYC chat protocol, it sounds like it would work very well, once released. Those guys have managed to hype me up, at any rate.

I definitely want to get a PSYC server running, if given an occasion to do so. (He-he-heeee!)

I'm taking a really trying class, as well as a (hopefully) fun class, the trying one being the COMP100, and the maybe fun one being COMP192. COMP100 was trying, not because it was hard, but due to the exact opposite. I was exerting 12 to 13 times the effort to keep from being sarcastic, unpleasant, exasperated, or something, than actually do the work. I must have succeeded, because, after I did the two labs due the next week in a short time that day, I impressed my instructor with the art in which I completed the work, rather than any disrespect for his class. I'm not saying the class isn't good, or anything like that, but it would be insulting in the extreme if I was unable to test out of it. Father forbid!

At any rate, I'm excited about this other class, this class I haven't experienced as of yet, COMP129. It sounds fun, and I've already heard good reports about the professor. I am not going to let myself be anything less than excellent in that class. According to what I've read and felt, I believe that, once completed successfully, you should be able to take the A+ Certification Exam, and do well (as in pass).

I'm waiting for my chance to prove that I have potential, and that I'm not a completely empty-headed fool.
I'm crazy, not stupid. (At least that's what I keep telling myself. My grandmother is hell-bent on proving just how stupid and useless I am, as is my grandfather. My old Major Payne is trying his best to motivate me with negative reinforcement, which I have grown immune to over the years. The only reason I pay him any mind at all is because I love the sorry sucker. That's the only reason I listen when he tells me I'm under his roof and that he expects the respect he deserves (he does deserve it). My grandfather tell me a lot of things that are difficult to listen to (not because the message inflicts any pain on me, but because I usually have to override the many parts of me that automatically shield me from ridicule, cruel jokes, criticism of any kind, especially negative, and other forms of mental, emotional, or other non-physical abuse, and such defenses take a lot of effort to override. I know it's for the best, logically, to listen to him, and heed the warnings and advice he gives, but the way he delivers the wisdom he does sounds so much like ranting patronization that I have to actively disable my automatic defenses designed to shield me from verbal assaults.

You can tell I have learned a few things about ignoring the stupid kids that like to make fun of kids besides themselves, can't you?

This armor is not enough for my grandfather, though, and I guess he intends to rip these very carefully designed walls down and build them how he wants to.

Ah, well. I love him anyway.

Back to my classes, I'll be going to my first COMP129 class this Wednesday at 6:00 PM in room 254.
Wish me luck!

Friday, March 9, 2007

Join my Google Group!

My Group is useful, and I will be submitting my Paper to it, so you guys can view it.Again, it's











Google Groups Beta

Subscribe to Alexnet Club

Email:


Visit this group


This is a useful Group to join. The compination of these two wonderful services by Google should solve many of my problems with keeping everybody informed. Subscribe to Alexnet Club for information on that whats and whens


Google Groups Beta

Subscribe to Alexnet Club

Email:


Visit this group

Anyway, I plan on blogging regularly, and I will strive my best to keep my friends, family, and other interested parties informed as to my thoughts, feelings, imaginings, and other snippets of my mind. I really do suggest you subscribe, but whether you do or not, I do intend to consummate this pact with myself.

In other news, I have just turned in my Journal (Actually my blog before this point), my Portfolio, and I've already turned in my Position Paper, which is on the building of fiber network infrastructure owned and managed by municipalities, to suppliment the spotty coverage of some larger telephone companies, like AT&T, QWest, and Verizon.

Richard? Where are you?

Richard? Where are you?

I'm looking for you!

No, really, I want to apologize. Make a note to this, if you want to talk.
If not, well, that's just fine.

But, I'd rather you talk to me before I die of old age.

I do love you, you know, and not in a funny way.

As I said, attention-seeking behaviour. I'm not funny and I'm not that kind of brother-lover.
I do love you, just not THAT way.

Bye.

Some More Crazy Ideas

Let's see.

I'm imagining a fictional spacecraft, with four grav-props (Gravity-Wave Propulsion Generators), they form a circular ring around the middle, then by tweaking the flow, generates small gravity distortions that propel the craft. It then stores energy in the ring, like an inductance coil, and releases it into the surrounding space-time, ripping a temporary wormhole in the spot it had been. In the same instance of time, many millions of light-centuries further, it lapses back into normal grav-prop mode, and docks with a spaceport.

Sound interesting? I bet I got that from somewhere. I thought it unique. Gravity Rings. You spin plasma around in a ring, tightly confined via manipulated gravity waves, and then force half of it to flow counter to the other half. Many collisions occur. Very great heat, increased pressure. In this scenario, it compacts so much energy, that it rips/stretches space-time so that further, more subtle, manipulations can be made, so that it transfers nearly simultaneously.

Modern magick is really a blend of nanotechnology, bioengineered viruses, and bacteria, integrated into genetically engineered super-soldiers, who fight for their freedom. They can manipulate anything from magnetic waves, and electricity, to fire, to gravity. Modulated gravity waves are used as a form of telepathy (outgoing only), based on neurophone technology, and fire manipulation is created by use of biofuel-carrying microbes generated by the adept's body, especially hands (palms and fingertips).

Most advanced is ability to separate into smaller lifeforms resembling normal common creatures in the wild, but remain a whole via clustering technologies via gravity-wave transmission for synchronization of mental processes.

When in multiple guises, sensory inputs are increases exponentially, but run the risk of being "scrambled," meaning, a gravity-wave noise generator disrupts communication between disparate parts, which could cause the soldier to be prevented from reassembling.

Creatures generated may vary based on a soldier's preferences, personality, or other factors, but birds of prey are favored, as well as coyotes, wolves, wildcats, small rodents. Usually mammals, birds, a few reptiles are favored by some REBAGs (Really Evil BAd Guys).

That should do it for now.

Richard Answer Here:

Please answer here: I'm going to try to let you answer a poll. Let's see if it works. Guess not.

Well, you can always comment.

Wednesday's Child offered me a scholarship, but I don't know what happened to it. I never received the money.

Richard Arthur Maurin

My name is Alex John Maurin, 19, of Dallas. I am a man on a mission.

I want to know how I can talk with my brother.

My Brother's name is Richard Arthur Maurin.

I want to apologize for all of the times I've hit him.

I want to apologize for all of the times I've yelled or cussed him out.

I want to look at him and say, "My bad," and see the verdict.

I would wish the crap away, but I can't so I'm just going to have to keep looking.

I imagine that CPS is trying to keep Richard isolated, so it can have more power over him, but I hope he has Internet access. If he uses email or web at all, I hope he will find this blog.

So, Richard, what's it going to be? Do you forgive me? Do you need some time? I bet you do. You may take as long as you want, as long as I hear the judgement before I die. Deal?

I hope so.

Richard Only - Others May View

This post is for Richard Only.

I'm addressing it to Richard,
so he can find me. Respond to this post if you're Richard. This blog is public like the others, but it's primary audience should be him.

Richard Richard Richard Richard Richard Richard Richard Richard Richard Richard Richard Richard Richard Richard

Arthur Arthur Arthur Arthur Arthur Arthur Arthur Arthur Arthur Arthur Arthur Arthur Arthur Arthur Arthur Arthur Arthur

Maurin Maurin Maurin Maurin Maurin Maurin Maurin Maurin Maurin Maurin Maurin Maurin Maurin Maurin Maurin

Richard, I saw you on Wednesday's Child. You didn't look happy. You are the only one who didn't make a comment. Richard, just know that we love you back home. David's in the Big House, good riddance, and now we have Mom, who I've loved since I was born, and probably before then, Penny, who is very sensitive, sweet, loving, kind, long-suffering, patient, warm, etc. And then there is Grandpa Carl. I love him to death, but he sure doesn't make it easy on me. The guy is attempting to "toughen me up," since I'm such a milksop to him. He even said one time, "Get Mama's tit out your mouth, and make something of yourself!" Okay. (I never was on her tit, except when I put on Mama's Gold. I needed that to set up my immune system. I was bottle-fed after that.). He definitely wants to put me through boot camp, but with all of the thugs in there now, I would never come out, except in a body bag.

Richard Arthur Maurin. I want you to forgive me. If you google this, please let me know by responding to this as a note.

Some Crazy Ideas

I sure hope this gets through the system okay.

Well, anyway. These are some crazy thoughts I've run through my head.

Fisrt, I wanted to join the DeVry Linux Users Club, but from what I could gather, they had disbanded, maybe becasue nobody had the time? I know I'm being given a steep learning curve, especially since even though the DeVry classes are easy so far, my Grandparents bombard me with "How the Real World Works" lessons, and a giant extended tutorial on manners. I know I need them, but they really shouldn't overload me like that. I've got enough confusion and stress going on up there without added burdens. They make it sound like I'm going to starve and die if I don't learn all of this stuff ASAP, and I would rather it be spread over a longer stretch of time. The clincher is that my grandparents make it a "take it or leave it" deal, and it shouldn't be, but they make it so. My grandfather loves me dearly, but he has this attitude that comes off as, "Oh, a kid! Let's put him in the Navy, they'll make a man out of him quicker than greased lightning!" When denied that option, he resorts to making the home his own private boot camp. I know he loves me, but he has a funny way of expressing it. I'm not the super-macho-coconuts-in-the-pants type, and I don't easily get testosterone poisoning, which should grant me some evolutionary points, but it seems there is not a general consensus on the value of a more straight-headed guy, one that isn't flaming gay, but is nevertheless more open-minded, more sympathetic, more appreciative, more caring, more emotionally balanced.

Before my Prom, I had the attitude of, "Oh, the Prom. So?" But after I found a willing Sophomore (yeah, I know, not the most "popular" guy in town), I went ahead and took her to it. It was as I expected it to be. Boring, frilly, big deal to the Big Headed Bozos (The children who made it to the Ballots for Class King and Queen, and various other laughs), and later, not a lot of activity. I did dance with my date a little, but as she told me, I could not dance, which was obvious to the both of us, She found a guy she knew from band, and danced with him a little. I met quite a few of her friends, some were band members, some I couldn't remember, maybe grew up together. Whatever.

Then the fun began. We went to the After Prom Party! I played laser tag maybe 16-20 times, sometimes annoying everybody with my Sarge routine. I thought it was funny, but they didn't take the game that seriously, anyway. I, of course, got #1 ranking about three times, I preserved those record slips until I moved to Dallas, where I promptly lost them in the moving mess. I don't think I still have them. If I do, it would be somewhere in that huge pile of papers in a particular box. I never got to go bowling with my date, however, but I sure did eat with her, talk with her, and spent some time with her. I also remember giving some sympathy to another girl whose date had canceled at the last minute. She had streaks all down her face, so I invited her to spend time with us, my date and I, and since my date didn't have nearly the amount of zest for the laser tag setup as I did, I imagine she spent some time playing games in the arcade, while I was battling in the laser tag arena.

I really miss my brother. His name is Richard Arthur Maurin. I won't go blabbing too much about him, in case I piss off Child Protective Services, and get their evil lawyers on my case. All I'm going to say is, I miss him big-time, and that I'm sorry that I hurt him, and that I would love to make it up to him somehow. I don't care if that means he ties me up, takes an ice pick, and stabs my arms and legs with it over and over. Yes, it would hurt like hell, but if it made him feel better, I'd submit to him, and let him do some inflicting. That's not to say I would take sadistic crap during all of the time I'm in his presence, I hope he doesn't develop something serious like that over this family crap, even though it's highly likely that he has been damaged severely by all of this crap.

Now that I'm started, I can't believe how evil the so called "guy," (more like an "it") my genetic father was, and how fatherly he wasn't. I can't imagine how a mide that crippled would move a single muscle! That guy is either so freaking sick, he shouldn't be alive, or just plain devil-spawn given flesh. Yes, I know his parents had serious Bipolar Disorder, and went Manic every now and then, but that doesn't excuse the thing (my not-father). That thing has serious issues. Next!

I always wondered why CPS keeps telling me that my brother, Richard is real pissed off at me for "telling the family secret." I don't get it. David was so freaking stupid, the authorities would have noticed his crotch-tag games eventually. I don't know why he'd rather be slapped around, kicked, stomped on (like my baby sister), thrown around against the walls, or sexually molested, instead of separated for a while by some incredibly stupid social workers. At least the inept social workers didn't molest me. I can't say that about my not-father. I was thrashed a bit, but that was, pretty much, the extent of it. That doesn't mean I like getting kicked around, but I'd rather be physically abused than sexually, any day.

Richard Arthur Maurin: If you ever read this, just know this. I'm sincerely sorry for all of that crap I put you through, I'm sorry I participated in that silly sibling rivalry gig, I'm sorry I hit you. I'm sorry for each time, whether I thought you deserved it, whethere you really did or not, You don't deserve to get picked on just because there's enough mother to go around. I really am. I'm sorry I was such a jerk, I'm sorry I didn't treat you like a brother when I had the chance. I'm so sorry that I left you with the memories of the attention-seeking lies I left at Meadow Pines RTC. I can't prove it, but I never, ever looked at you like that. Ever. I loved you ONLY as a brother would his little brother. I can prove that I care when you move in over to our apartment. By that time we should have a really big apartment, and I'll have a job to help pay for it. Every time you need Mom's attention, you can have it. I'll wait patiently until your done, and then I'll say what I have to say, how's that?

I really do love you, Richard. I mean it.

Here are the plans so far: I'm 18, so that means you should be about 16, now. Huh. I bet you're bigger than me! If you wanted to, you could probably beat me up, now! Anyway, if you read this, please make a note of it here on Blogspot. Thanks.

Thursday, March 8, 2007

Tossing Ideas Around -Note Jotting

Let's see...

16 characters, one for each Jung-Meyers-Briggs "type"?

Probably not.

Primary Theme?

?= Coming of Age, Use of Wisdom (as applied to technology), Disadvantages of Bigotry, Rescue (Later)?

Zander and Chloe go on a journey to find their place in a world they no longer understand, by defeating a system of control used to manipulate them and their families.


----

Utopia

Can the Day get Any Worse?

Weirdos, Weirdos, Everywhere!

Something I can't Quite Put a Finger on...

Abilities Gained, Freedoms Lost

That Crazy Dream

Are You Sure You're my Mom?

I Guess I'm Insane

Mix and Match

Responsibility, that Necessary Evil

I Hope It isn't You!

Tangled Webs Woven

Ooh, a Journey! What next?

On the Road Again!

Disillusionment

Oh, boy, a Snake Bite! Just What the Really Evil Bad Guy Ordered!

Waiter, there's a Flesh-Eating Worm in my Gut!

Oh, no! It's Them Zombies 'Gain!

Really Evil Guy's Lair, at Last!

Just Not Our Day

They Took My Wife, and She's Out There Cookin' Pecan Pies!

There's More Than Pecans in There, isn't There?

National Heathen Day

Licking Our Nasty, Green-Glowing Wounds

What's in that Water, Anyway?

Lots of Colors, Few Options

A Desperate Plan

Execution of an Iffy Plan

What, Do I Look Like Your Manservant?

I can't Believe You Said That!

Distraction? Oh, Yeah, Right! Like That'll Ever Work!

Pretty Colors, a Flash and a Bang

The Same Old, Same Old.

Restoration of Order

A Strictly Nonelectrical Spark

You Know What They Say, It's Only the Beginning!

Back from the living, I come from the flesh

It always makes my day, when I'm allowed to be extremely morbid. I just hope this doesn't strike the wrong chord with any potential boss.

Well, what happened so far... let's see....

At the beginning of Sr. Prof. Cloete's class, I struggled to keep a marginal level of brain activity running, which was an uphill battle for me, as I dutifully rose from the dead at, what, 4 to 5 in the morning, got myself reasonably presentable for class, and ate myself a breakfast, which required many calories to digest, with the calories produced from the food eaten ready for use after a considerable delay, perhaps 2 to 3 hours, I'm not a dietitian/nutritionist, I don't know, but anyway, I arranged for transportation via my beloved mother, and off we went, an hour plus drive (one of the countless reasons I love her so dang much). I attended my Critical Thinking class, and then Composition.

I went to Monster.com and JobFinder.com and registered, landed a job at a staffing company called CoWorx. Seemed to be a reputable company. Did the little interview, did my first W2 Form, and all. Really neat. They hooked me up with Intechra, an asset reclamation company, but it was not working out for either of us, so that relationship ended.

This past 8 weeks my mom applied for and landed a job at Half Price Books Records Magazines, and she still has that job. I was absolutely 100% certain that she'd fit the job perfectly, and they, meaning Mom, and two friends of ours, two Davids, (what a coincidence, eh?) one had the job for a while before, but the other was applying at about the same time as Mom, but luckily, they both landed positions. I'm happy for them.

They both are very cautious, since they are still in training, but they are very knowledgable, they both know the bookselling business, they are very well read, and they are professional without being boring. You have to love that balance. I'm told I'm a lot of fun to be around, but can be very unprofessional when I'm not trying to be professional, and get very silly, and goofy.

I can't believe that those people who keep telling me college is hard as heck were right, more than I imagine they knew! Unbelievable. But I have to run into reality sooner or later. since I'm on the edge, I imagine I have a better view of what people like to believe, and what is glaringly obvious. This makes my an "outsider."

I seem to have this characteristic opinion, that people shouldn't conform for conformity's sake. Is that wrong? Will I grow out of that? I hope not. I also seem to have this idea that misinformation is control at it's worst. The people who know, I hope, are acting with the good of the country at heart and mind, and not wallet or bank account, or worse-I'm not EVEN going into that. (ugh!)

Anyway, I'll try to be more regular, and I'll be back, probably tomorrow.

--
"what kind of chip you got in there, a Dorito?"

Monday, January 29, 2007

Okay, I should have done this earlier, but...

...I didn't think of this option until it was too late. I'll go ahead and transfer all of my previous journal entries later.

Now, to the good stuff:

I'm 19 years old, obviously male, thin, kinda lanky with dark hair. I've inherited gray-hazel eyes, and I like to sing. I sing a an SATB choir at Church, but I'm also trying to set my laptop up to take the punishment necessary to process sound and music like that. Maybe not, as my computer may revolt on me.

I have a whole bunch of journal topics to go through, but I'll start with:

What is my favorite food? It's a classic simple question, but must be asked.

My favorite food would be: the Blueberry Scone
Especially when not burnt to a crisp. I haven't had them in a while, so if someone I know reads this and makes one with out burning it too much, hey, they would get on my good side embarrassingly quickly.

My favorite dessert? Toughie, that one. I'd have to say, blueberry cheesecake, followed closely by lemon meringue, and then Banana Nut Bread as a cake. After that, banana pudding with whipped cream and vanilla wafers.

My favorite Veggie? That also is a Toughie. Fried okra comes to mind, then corn-on-the-cob, then creamed corn, then crisp carrots with ranch dressing, then candied carrots.

Sweet teeth? Who, me? No-o-o-o. Not Me!

Okay, maybe I've got a good half dozen, but who doesn't like dark chocolate, if their bodies can metabolize it? I've recently had the pleasure of trying Godiva's "Choco-lixir," and I made sure I took small sips, and held the warm fluid in my mouth for a good minute before letting it flow down my throat. Purely divine, I remarked. And it was, for a mortal-made drink.


Great stuff.

I also got a bar with raspberry in it there as well, and it was very good, too.

I enjoy supreme pizza, extremely spicy thai, like Pei Wei's food, and I always go for a large, spicy burrito, with beef, tomatoes, lettuce, hot sauce, spices, and sour cream, as well as a good number of other delightful things.

I'm a Texan Pepper-Belly, can you tell?

I want to try that Instant Insanity Hot Sauce at that Texas store on the third floor at the galleria, and when I dump it in my burrito, I want everyone I know watching as the steam clears out my sinuses. That'll be a Kodak Moment, all right!

What's happened since the last post, we-he-he-e-ell! That'll take a while!

Well the last week contained some interesting events, not the least of which would be my inspecting the job arena. I created accounts in http://www.monster.com , http://www.careerbuilder.com , and http://hotjobs.yahoo.com .

Now I have emails coming in from all sides, it's a hail of job offers! Help!

Today, I woke up, started to put up the sleeper couch, but Mimi wanted to have the sheets washed instead, then I checked Mom to make sure she didn't need any IT help, ate a breakfast of Raisin Bran with a little sugar, eating fast enough to get it down before it got soggy, and then I got on the laptop I'm on right now, to check my email, and I discovered I flaw in Firefox. http://www.devryu.net sometimes creates a bug in which the navigation bar does not stay up to date, and the searchbar does not work, if you try to use it, it's like their are no search engines their, and no way to put any in. I'm not sure if it can be reproduced, but that really bugged me. I reinstalled Firefox, and that seems to have temporarily fixed it. I then ate a more substantial breakfast, I fried some eggs, zapped some sausage, toasted a slice of bread, and put some peach preserves on it.

I then added some cayenne pepper and garlic salt, and then some salsa, and had myself a little breakfast. Good stuff, but not nearly as good as when Grandpa takes out the Belgian waffle iron, and cooks a good dozen. One memorable time, he did his thing with the waffle iron, and he manufactures a good dozen soft fluffy Belgian waffles, with whipped cream and peach pie filling on top. Add to than some natural maple syrup from Whole Foods Market, and some sausages, white grape peach fruit juice blend, and he established a permanent residence in my memory.

Oh, good stuff. That's what I want for my next birthday, on November the thirteenth of 2007. A trip to the Dallas Arboretum would be nice, too.

I better wrap this up. Bye, Journal!